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Student sanely, successfully graduates college responsibly
A local college student’s recent accomplishment has sent experts from all across the world into a frenzy. In a move attracting the attention of representatives everywhere—from the Vatican to Ripley’s Believe it Or Not!—Timothy Gilmour, 22, is confirmed to be on track to receive his college degree on time with no issues whatsoever.
First World problems: a growing threat to global security
United Nations Security Council meet to discuss the issue By Keating Smith, Chief Procrastinating Correspondent The United Nations Security…
Correction: Super cool guy did not trip in public
Many witnesses reported that Harris seemed to have twisted his ankle upon landing, based on the fact that they heard him yell “Ow, my ankle!”