Pump up the volume

Fake crowd noise for spectator-less sporting events have given Dr. Bonnie Henry an idea

By Craig Allan, Staff Writer


As sports leagues like the NHL and the MLB come back, players must get use to the new normal of playing in front of no fans. This includes tarps covering seats, cardboard cut outs of fans in the stands, and pumped-in crowd noise from loudspeakers. The addition of the crowd noise has led to a lifelike atmosphere around the sport of play. This level of artificial activity has intrigued BC’s Chief Health Officer, Dr. Bonnie Henry.

She is now looking to introduce this technology into open spaces like Jack Poole Plaza and Granville Street. Dr. Henry says that these noises will help people feel like they are back in the good old days when we were all basking in the glow of drunken yahoos and pre-pandemic life.

The areas in question will have large speakers hanging over and blasting crowd noise. Test run received reactions from passersby’s such as Jasmine Callender who said this: “IT’S SO LOUD! I CAN’T HEAR ANYTHING BUT THE NOISE!” Paul WaCarty stated “WHAT?! WHAT DID YOU SAY?!” Dr. Henry said the speakers will also be programed to make other sounds at certain times. These include construction work at 6 am, SkyTrain maintenance noise at 4 am, and a crying baby every five minutes.

She also said, “I knew that this would make a lot of ‘noise,’ so I have also commissioned a home version of the speaker so that all British Columbians can enjoy these sounds in their very own bedrooms. Remember, the pandemic is not forever, but these sounds will be!”