Bodies in the sand

Tropical drink melting in your hand

[quote style=”boxed”]It is not these well-fed long-haired men that I fear, but the pale and the hungry-looking.
– Julius Caesar[/quote]

By Cody Klyne, Editor in Chief

Well cats and kittens, I hope you’ve got your skimpy skivvies prepped and ready to go for beach season, because this summer’s set to be a scorcher! Wait. Hold the phone. Let’s pretend I didn’t just refer to you, our respected and cherished readers, as “cats” and/or “kittens” (whichever the case may be); is my social anxiety over parading my painfully pale “bod”in front of the world showing already? Every year it’s the same, beginning in January with the optimistic, if totally self- depreciating (and totally bullshit) New Year’s resolution to get into shape, I’m left wanting and reflecting on my poor choices six months (or roughly 180 days) after the fact. Do you ever stop to wonder that maybe, you never even really wanted to make the “change” in the first place?

Each and every day we make choices: when to get up, what to eat, who to talk to, what to read, and what to do with the time we have. Each choice we make changes our course for the day, impacting every action and subsequent result that follows in miniscule and equally profound ways. Hypothetically speaking, if I started the morning eating two breakfast sandwiches at McDonald’s, Imight decide to watch my caloric intake for the rest of the day and eat nothing but celery and grapefruit to try and make up for it. Alternatively, I might just say “eff it,” as I am prone to do, and binge and eat terribly for the entirety of my waking hours, promising myself that it won’t become a regular “thing.” What I’m trying to say is: I shouldn’t be surprised that I’m in the sorry state that I am.

Looking back to the big ball drop and the grandiose thoughts of self-improvement that were racing through my head at the time, I didn’t do anything to achieve, or (let’s be honest) evenhalfway meet, the goals I set for myself. That said, I think I’m kind of okay with it. If like me you’ve a history of fasting before a big beach day in an attempt to trick those around you into believing you’re just that skinny, don’t bother. To be honest—and I mean this in the best of ways—no one cares. So get out there and enjoy the few months of decent weather we have each year you beautiful (insert body-type here) so-and-so.

As far as this month’s edition of The Other Press is concerned, our oiled-up and super slick squad of editors and writers cover topics ranging from coverage of local Enbridge protests, summer skin care, an ode to finding (or not finding) employment after graduation, as well as our exclusive Euro 2012 preview. Also, don’t forget to check us out online at www.theotherpress.ca for all this and more. Happy June, you beach bums!