Merry November

Photo of Mariah Carey via 'Rolling Stone'
Photo of Mariah Carey via ‘Rolling Stone’

By Chandler Walter, Editor-in-Chief

 

“I don’t want a lot for Christmas / There is just one thing I need…”

Mariah Carey’s relentless-if-somewhat-catchy Christmas tune invaded my ears this week as I was browsing at the mall, and that’s when Christmas hit me full-on in all its sickeningly jolly splendour.

It was as if a curtain had drawn from my eyes, and looking around I realized that the store windows had fake snow, there was a suspicious amount of red and green, and an actual mall Santa had staked his claim in the atrium, with a line forming of forward-thinking families.

And I thought to myself: “Seriously? Already?”

I knew it was coming. In fact, at the other publication I work for we had already started writing up our seasonal “Things to do in Vancouver this Christmas,” and “Where to get your Christmas tree” articles.

But I told myself that we were just getting a foot up on the competition; that, with Halloween over, the public needed somewhere more festive to look towards than the mustaches of Movember.

But I didn’t think it was mall Santa time quite yet, and I still don’t.

It seems as though, every year, Christmas (and I would say “The Holidays” but this is very much a sin committed by Christmas above all else) sneaks up further and further into November, to the point that we’re still trying to finish eating the leftover Halloween candy when the candy canes and chocolates make their seasonal reappearance.

I’ve got nothing against Christmas, or any other holidays for that matter. I get it, it’s fun giving presents to loved ones, sitting around a family dinner, and doing the whole Santa thing.

But when people start blasting Christmas music, saying things like “It’s that time of year again,” and making sure that every single radio advertisement has something to do with the fact that the holidays are coming up, it can get a little tiresome.

I mean, yeah, it’s a low-hanging fruit to grab, and I’m not completely oblivious to my own hypocrisy in writing a Lettitor about the very thing I’m telling people to shut up about.

When it comes down to it, however, it’s clear that letting the holidays bleed into November dilutes December’s cheer for the worse, so that by the time the actual day rolls around people are breathing a sigh of relief, rather than shouting out in celebration.

And we’ve all got enough on our plates already, wouldn’t you think?