By Kirsten Scott-Wuori, Contributor
Did you forget to wear a shirt today? Did you wear too many shirts today? Were you so hungry after lunch that you found yourself eating barely-trash Timbits from the cafeteria garbage can? Did you get your period in any memorable way? We want to know about it. We know that there are times in your life when you look at yourself and you can barely believe the shameful person looking back at you—but don’t worry! There’s absolutely absolution in sharing. Get it off your chest. Send us your most cringe-worthy confessions at email@example.com, and spread the shame.
I recently decided that I was going to give online dating a shot—lets face it, it’s been a while, and a girl has needs. I burned through all of the usual free suspects: Tinder, POF, stalking friends of friends on Instagram, but nothing stuck. All I found were the creeps, the weirdos, and the seriously-confused–as-to-why-I-was-contacting-them guys.
So I caved and decided to pay for it.
I chose carefully, and within my means; I wanted a site that wasn’t so exclusive that I would attract men looking for a midlife crisis, but I also wasn’t looking for a broke guy wanting someone to finance his weed habit.
As soon as I signed up with my site of choice, I was immediately matched with plenty of options—some with more potential than others. When I filled out my preferences (i.e. must love dogs, good sense of humour, older than me, etc.) I figured I would be matched with men who were mature, funny, and not related to me. That’s right, on day three with my carefully selected dating site I was matched with my uncle. Stats: good looking, successful, healthy, loves dogs, and is a blood relative and this would be illegal.
I have now given up on the Internet. #Winning