Dating during the pandemic

The challenges in trying to find love during NODID-19
By Brandon Yip, Senior Columnist

Being told to wear a mask during sex is the equivalent of being told to sit in your car with the keys in the ignition and engine removed!

Virtual dating is about as much fun as going to a restaurant and not being able to sample the food that you have ordered.

The pandemic has posed many challenges for those trying to seek love during COVID-19. Several months ago, there were several articles promoting self-satisfaction due to the pandemic. There is nothing wrong with some self-servicing to love oneself as the late comedian George Carlin once quipped: “I think if God had intended us not to masturbate, he would have made our arms shorter!” Besides masturbation, other options include virtual sex or seeking glory holes. The BC Centre for Disease Control on their official website recommends people use glory holes as an alternative: “Use barriers, like walls (e.g., glory holes), that allow for sexual contact but prevent close face-to-face contact.”    

Provincial Health Officer, Dr. Bonnie Henry a few months ago, demonstrated the safest way to use glory holes. Okay, I am kidding, that was a joke! But to be serious, Dr. Henry has advised the public not to socialize with people, other than with the ones in our own household (bubble). In May 2020, during her usual COVID-19 briefing Dr. Henry cautioned people about going on dating binges: “If you are going to start a relationship with somebody, this is not the time to do rapid, serial dating, okay? Pick somebody, see if it works, and then take your time.” Dr. Henry understands how challenging it is when people are not allowed to seek out intimate one-on-one connections: “It’s an incredibly challenging time for all of us and when we don’t have ready-made people within our bubble it can be more lonely. I think many people have adapted to online (dating) and talking online and to having encounters online that can be… quite… helpful in that regard.”

 In a September 2020 statement published on CTV News, Dr. Theresa Tam advised people to practice safe sex during the pandemic: “Sexual health is an important part of our overall health. However, sex can be complicated in the time of COVID-19, especially for those without an intimate partner in their household or whose sexual partner is at higher risk for COVID-19.” Dr. Tam further elaborates, “By taking these precautions and staying conscious of the risks we assume, Canadians can find ways to enjoy physical intimacy while safeguarding the progress we have all made containing COVID-19.”

Furthermore, Dr. Tam urges people to refrain from activities like kissing and avoid “face-to-face contact or closeness” during sex. As well, she suggests to “consider using a mask that covers the nose and mouth.” Being told to wear a mask during sex is the equivalent of being told to sit in your car with the keys in the ignition and engine removed!

Not all is bleak in the dating world as there are numerous dating apps and websites where people can look for love. The use of technology to communicate and meet people has never been more utilized than it has now during the pandemic. Unfortunately, meeting people in person is not advised for the moment, but it allows people to connect virtually and slowly build a connection during these difficult times. Sara Konrath, a researcher at Indiana University says dating is very challenging during COVID-19, however there is reason for optimism: “I have been surprisingly optimistic—even in my own life. More people are looking for serious relationships, are doing the work to prepare themselves, are valuing emotional connection and kindness, and have the time to get to know each other deeply. These are all promising for long-lasting romantic relationships.” 

Best dating sites during pandemic according to CNET.com

Bumble: Best for confident women
Clover: Best for confirming a date
Coffee Meets Bagel: Best for breaking the silence
eHarmony: Best for marriage seekers
Happn: Best for missed connections
Her: Best for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women
Hinge: Best for serious relationship seekers
The League: Best for people with high standards
Match: Best for someone with money to spend
OKCupid: Best free dating site
Plenty of Fish: Best for conversations
Tinder: Best for quick and easy hookups