Guy spends Douglas College student money on tacos
By Michele Provenzano, Staff Writer
We all enjoy a lavish meal. But you don’t want to spend all your hard-earned cash, do you? There may be a new club at Douglas College to alleviate this issue.
Last week, the college held its semesterly clubs fair. The Other Press was on the scene in the concourse of New Westminster campus, scoping out the new clubs that seek to recruit members. Many students may feel reluctant to approach the information tables at the fair due to shyness, general apathy, or the inability to relate to any of the niche categories of interests that are represented.
My top recommendation for a general interest club with whom any Douglas College student could easily identify and see themselves getting involved? The We Love Food but Don’t Want to Spend Money On It Club. This ground-breaking club plans to hold weekly get-togethers that consist of sharing a meal — specifically, a meal funded by the budget allocated to the club through the Douglas Students’ Union.
“So, me and my buddies here heard that clubs get, like, a certain amount of money to spend each semester,” club founder Harold Chow told the Other Press, slouched in the metal folding chair provided for the club’s booth. Two of Chow’s companions hovered nearby. “We figured, like, hey, we love food. Let’s just take that money and get dinner with it once a week.”
When asked why they were displaying only an acronym of the club’s name instead of the full name on their table’s signage, the club executives chuckled. A few hushed utterances between the friends followed before Chow spoke up, explaining that the DSU doesn’t yet know exactly what the club’s goals are.
“They didn’t really question what the W.L.F.B.D.W.T.S.M.O.I. Club stood for when we filled out the clubs fair application.”
Were they worried the mysterious signage would deter potential members?
“The thing is, we’re not actually trying to attract that many people,” said Chow. “We just need enough names to make the club official. After that, the more people we have, the less food each of us get, so that’s lame. I might just forge the rest of the signatures so it can be just the three of us.”
When prompted to explain what greater purpose the club will serve the Douglas College community, Chow stated he didn’t understand the question. However, he said the club’s first catered meal will be a build-your-own-taco bar.
“Uh, wait, actually, can we not put this in the paper?” said Chow. “Dude, we can’t have word spreading about us or else there’s barely gonna be enough to go around.”