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Category: HUMOUR

HUMOUR

Kids born in the 2000s now on roads, police warn

The Other PressJanuary 25, 2017

“We know that it’s a frightening time to be driving, especially for the seniors out there, but we can assure the public that we are doing everything in our power to keep traffic as safe as possible.”

Filmmakers continue to bravely insist on making the majority of their films male-centric
HUMOUR

Filmmakers continue to bravely insist on making the majority of their films male-centric

The Other PressJanuary 25, 2017January 31, 2017

“Like, how many female characters and female-led storylines do you want? Half? In what world is that realistic?”

HUMOUR

Student who finished first too nervous to hand in test, class stalls

The Other PressJanuary 25, 2017

“It’s now been 143 hours and 17 minutes. They could have written their midterms, finals, and 20-page research papers by now.”

HUMOUR

You can now get official certification in mansplaining

The Other PressJanuary 25, 2017January 25, 2017

Never use “in my opinion,” “I think,” or show any leniency or doubt, because you have to make her realize that she only thinks the way she does because she doesn’t know any better.

HUMOUR

Women wearing short skirts in this weather are better, stronger than I am

The Other PressJanuary 18, 2017

They are not beholden to the whims of the weather. They are made of stronger stuff than most.

HUMOUR

The great salt wars

The Other PressJanuary 18, 2017

We were our own worst enemies, at the beginning of it all, though the war that would befall us was one that no one could have possibly foretold.

Local student confidently gives wrong answer in class, disintegrates from shame
HUMOUR

Local student confidently gives wrong answer in class, disintegrates from shame

The Other PressJanuary 18, 2017January 25, 2017

“I would say the disintegration was an act of mercy.”

Fiery Eye of Sauron appears above Surrey Central building
HUMOUR

Fiery Eye of Sauron appears above Surrey Central building

The Other PressJanuary 18, 2017January 25, 2017

Sauron’s appearance has led to discontent among many renters and landowners around the Surrey Central area.

HUMOUR

Alcohol sales spike in anticipation of Trump’s inauguration

The Other PressJanuary 18, 2017

I pretty much threw in the towel sobriety-wise when Pissgate happened.

Sex, Drugs, and Rock n’ Roll have broken up
HUMOUR

Sex, Drugs, and Rock n’ Roll have broken up

The Other PressJanuary 10, 2017January 18, 2017

“I don’t want to limit myself, but I’d like to settle down a little bit. I guess I just miss that ol’ fashion Rock n’ Roll.”

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