‘Is that the film where the two chicks kiss?’

Man who has seen no nominated movies very opinionated about the Oscars

By Isabelle Orr, Entertainment Editor

 

While the Oscars were being held in Los Angeles last Sunday, local man Oliver Pennington was vocal and open about how he felt about the prestigious awards.

“There were no good movies this year,” declared Pennington.

The Academy Awards, which recognize both artistic and technical excellence within the film industry, were no match for Pennington, who has seen all of the Fast and Furious franchise.

“Why is Lady Gaga in a movie?” Pennington asked. “She’s a singer. What’s up with that?”

Despite his lack of film expertise, Pennington made sure to tell others exactly what he thought of the awards show.

“The Oscars are dumb and it’s stupid that people care so much about them,” Pennington told Other Press reporters. “Everyone at my work was filling out ballots and going to Susan’s party. I didn’t get an invite, but it’s cool because even if I was invited, I wouldn’t have gone anyway.

“People should have real hobbies, like my fantasy football league,” he added.

When giving his film critiques, Pennington made sure to tell people about the one “Intro to Film” class he took during college.

“The classes were at night, so I usually fell asleep halfway through the movie,” he said. “But I still got a B-minus. I’m pretty much Scorsese at this point.”

Similar to how the Oscars ranks movies for awards, Pennington has his own rating system for determining a movie’s merit.

“Movies are pretty expensive, so I only go to movies in the theatre when I know they’re gonna be really good. An easy way to tell is if the movie stars the Rock or Vin Diesel. Those are both kickass names, so you know it’s going to be a real kickass movie.”

Pennington wasn’t the only person making his thoughts about the Oscars crystal-clear. Vancouver local Richard Darvis also shared his thoughts with the Other Press.

“Why do they nominate such artsy shit? Why can’t they have any good movies in there, like Deadpool 2? I thought Ryan Reynolds was good in that. Or at least good enough to win an Academy Award.”

“How come it has to be movies from just last year?” Samuel Novak, self-proclaimed “film buff,” asked reporters. “Why can’t my favourite movie Donnie Darko be nominated?”

“Some of the films weren’t even in English,” said Gerald Rickson. “How am I supposed to understand them? With subtitles on? Then it wouldn’t be a movie, it would be a book.”

When asked if he would watch the Oscars next year, Pennington was indecisive.

“The dresses that all the actresses were wearing this year didn’t even show any skin, so there was really nothing there for me. I guess I’ll tune in if they make another Deadpool. Why wasn’t Paddington Bear up for an award? Paddington was pretty good.”