Give me give me

Illustration by Ed Appleby

Illustration by Ed Appleby

What to do when you reek of desperation

By Elliot Chan, Opinions Editor

We all want something. We all have objectives and goals. That’s good. That’s the fuel that propels us forward in life. However, there are times when we’ve been sitting idle or maybe even fallen behind. We end up thinking that good things will never happen, and that we’ll never get back to where we were or achieve what we want. It could be money, romance, competition, or personal pursuit—when we put all our chips down on the table, we can’t help feeling desperation creep up.

Our desperation is a response to our stress. It’s useful in a life-or-death situation. When we are desperate for food, for example, we would go to incredible length to feast. There’s nothing stronger than the will to live. But when it comes to being desperate in a social interaction, such as a job interview or a first date, our undeniable hunger may be incredibly off-putting.

Nobody likes being around people who are desperate. Nobody wants to work with someone who is on edge about every task, or go out to dinner with someone who has an agenda. Most of us want to relax and not feel our heart beating out of our chest. Now, I understand that simply saying “Don’t be desperate” is not the solution. It’s not a switch you can turn off and on. It goes deeper than that.

Desperation is rooted in fear. You fear that you’ll be in debt forever. You fear that you’ll be alone forever. You fear that all your hard work will be for nothing. To lose the smell of desperation on you, you need to wash the fear off yourself, and be reminded that what progress you are going to make will be gradual. Do people win lotteries? Sure. But you cannot bank on that. What you need to do is accept that you’ll have to take baby steps towards your goals. You’ll feel less desperate if your tasks seem achievable to begin with.

Alternatively, you can just forget about it. So you are single, and worried that you’ll be alone forever. You’ve gone on dates, but there’s no magic and it just didn’t click. Stop dating for a bit. Take a class. Go on a trip. Meet new people. Pivot away from the problem and work on something else for a bit. Build your confidence back up in something else and then dive back into dating after.

Nowadays, we are not faced with deadly situations. Our own fears are constructed inside our own brain, and that’s where they fester. When you wonder why you are striking out, it could be because the people around you can smell your desperation. Get clean, relax, and know that you’ll get many chances. But before you take another one, maybe take a break first.

The Other Press

The Other Press, Douglas College's student newspaper since 1976. Articles, insight and updates from the New West and Coquitlam campuses.

More Posts - Website

3,929 comments on “Give me give me
  1. Hi there! I know this is kinda off topic but
    I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this website?

    I’m getting fed up of WordPress because I’ve had problems with hackers and I’m looking at alternatives for another
    platform. I would be great if yoou coukd ppoint me
    in the direction of a good platform.

  2. Whether you need a credible brain injury legal representative, a products obligation lawyer or one more kind of
    injury lawyer in Chicago to answer your lawful concerns, get
    in touch with The Law Workplaces of Newman, Boyer & Statham, Ltd.

  3. Bigfoot Wild animals Control Provider and Exemptions
    also does bird removal, trapping, as well as roosting avoidance
    solutions for commercial structures and also domestic.

  4. Shortly after, SK Telecom and KT announced yesterday that they had started
    selling the white i – Phone 4 at its stores. All the products that Tekno-avr brings in the Technology market are not only extremely innovative, but are
    also extremely useful for the end users. There are a handful of apps that help to do the video conferencing.

  5. Now that you know how-to your already existing routine, here is an expert idea that will help with it customized to your skin and targets, you enhance your routine a lot
    more: Set a skin consultation up with a certified aesthetician inside your town.

  6. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
    I think that you could do with a few pics to
    drive the message home a bit, but instead of that, this is magnificent blog.

    An excellent read. I will definitely be back.

  7. Costs there can be as minimal as $500 for your automobile
    in a excellent situation. The turbo 4-banger
    in the Volkswagon GTI Mk5 is fairly unique among such engines in that it produces huge amounts of torque at a relatively low number of RPMs.
    Go to the search tool and search for keyword like used cars in Bangalore,
    pre owned cars and second hand cars in Bangalore.

  8. While the surfing spots feature a consistent swell, long runs, permanently warm (28C) crystal clear waters, the stretch of lovely sand, being
    devoid of luxury hotels, affords laidback beach holidays
    on budget accommodation in a casual atmosphere.

  9. I’m really enjoying the design and layout of your blog. It’s a very
    easy on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable for me to come here and visit
    more often. Did you hire out a developer to create your theme?
    Superb work!

  10. Garcinia cambogia acts to suppress your appetite
    hinder the manufacturing of fat and also fat storage space, along with burns unwanted fat down payments throughout the whole body.

  11. My brother recommended I may like this website.
    He used to be totally right. This put up actually made my day.
    You cann’t imagine just how so much tume I had spent for this info!

    Thank you!

  12. A empresa de mudanças interestaduais Santhiago oferece além dos
    serviços já conhecidos para realizar as mudanças interestaduais
    e também estaduais, uma frota inteira equipada com rastreamento
    24h por dia, que oferece segurança e também controle da empresa sobre cumprimento do prazo acordado entre empresa e também seus fregueses.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.