The Amanda Todd story and what it means for women at Douglas College
By Sophie Isbister, Staff Writer
Amanda Toddâs story flashes in black and white across my screen. Even though the now-famous video was posted to YouTube a month and a half ago, hundreds of comments per minute are still added to the barrage of condolences, support, and continued taunts. The story of Amanda Todd touches us all. She was the girl close to a home, one who could have been any of us girls who grew up in the technological age with a computer in every room. Toddâs story, told painstakingly in flashcards on the eight-minute film, ended on October 10 when she committed suicide.
In early 2011, following an increase of sexual assault on campus, a Toronto police officer told a group of women students at York University that in order to deter rape “women should avoid dressing like sluts.” The backlash following this comment was astronomical, and created the impetus for the now-international SlutWalk, a feminist rally designed to address the culture of slut shaming that permeates our society.
What do Amanda Todd and the SlutWalk have in common? Both stories take place in a culture that blames victims of sexual abuse and both stories can be used as examples on how we can improve our society. Thatâs where my story starts.
Todd committed suicide in the wake of a three-year bullying campaign which started when, in grade seven, she flashed a man on webcam and those pictures were made public a year later by the man. The extent of her bullying involved stalking (both by the original perpetrator and then later by her former classmates), physical violence, verbal abuse, and cyber-abuse on Facebook. And the abuse continuesâpeople on the Internet, complete strangers, continue to victimize and victim-blame Amanda Todd.
In order to unpack this culture of victim blaming and slut shaming, I sat down with the Douglas Student Unionâs (DSU) Womenâs Liaison Jenelle Davies, as well as two student staff members of the Douglas College Womenâs Centre, Shila Avissa and Jasmeen Rahiman. We met in the New Westminster campusâ Womenâs Centre, a small-but-cozy room which boasts couches, a microwave, and a library with academic gender studies resources as well as novels. Itâs also meant to be a safe space for women, which means itâs a judgement-free zone, a place on campus that offers support for women, whatever they happen to be going through.
Rahiman tells me that the Womenâs Centre isnât about counselling, but more about peer support: âWe by no means tell [women] what to do, we try to help them do what they think is best for themselves.â Rahimanfinds her role as an advocate for women on campus to be a rewarding one, saying, âTrying to voice what theyâre trying to say, I think that helps them a lot.â
Avissa adds, âAside from supporting women who come in, we talk to all genders about the root causes of oppressionâŚI think all of us have that conversation every day with all genders. Every single day.â Itâs a hard battle to fight, but we know the end result that we need: a culture where victims will be supported and taken care of by their communities, not ostracized and re-victimized.
âA lot of women come up to me with issues that theyâre not comfortable bringing forward in any practical or official way through the school,â says Davies about her role with the DSU and how she helps women. âI can address that issue on their behalf as long as Iâm given their permission, and thatâs why itâs really important that, as a womanâs voice on campus, we work really hard and we work together.â
Peer support, advocacy, and awareness are the bulk of the work that Rahiman, Avissa, and Davies engage in. Awareness, according to Davies, is something that needs to be an ongoing process: âWe need to do tabling on campus, we need to have the services available, we need to have Twitter and Facebook and online sources, we need to do writing,â she says.
âI think one thing we are missing right now is respect for one another,â says Avissa. âWe cannot like a lot of people. Thatâs fine, but it doesnât mean that we canât treat you like a human being. Thatâs what weâre losing in all kinds of institutions.â In regards to the continued struggle against sexism, racism, and homophobia in Canada, Avissa tells me, âThe work is not done. The work is not even halfway done.â
Thatâs why it is still so important to have these safe spaces and support for marginalized groups, women in particular. âI think Amanda Toddâs case is a really good example of why there needs to be a space you can go to where youâll be with like-minded, educated women,â says Davies. The support needs to be there for women, both on campuses and in high schools, where girls are learning how to be women.
One of Amanda Toddâs flashcards says âI have nobody.â Imagine a Canada where girls like Amanda, where victims of sexual abuse or sexual assault do have somebody. Where they have a place they can go, like a womenâs centre, where they can find mentors and resources; a place that can hopefully mitigate the kind of violence that Amanda Todd experienced at her school.
Creating a tighter community is the key to fostering that respect, college-wide and country-wide alike. Rahiman says itâs as simple as a smile: âThere are too many people just walking right by each other. I think that youâre not going to build anything [from that]. Donât go home. Spend that 10 minutes, explore your campus. See what you have here. Smile!â
The Womenâs Centre is located in room 2850 at the New Westminster campus and in room A1301 at David Lam. Theyâre open from 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday to Friday. They can also be contacted via Facebook and Twitter.