What not to do in a Haunted Hause

Advice from your local scarer
By Angelika Leal, Contributor

One time, a guest entered the room I was in, walked straight up to me, and grabbed my face like they were about to kiss me. Do I even have to explain how goddamn disturbing that is?

Haunted Houses are a perfect activity to get you in a spooky mood for the Halloween season. But, before you decide to go into one, there are some unspoken rules that you should be aware of. These rules come from the point of view of someone who works as an actor at a Haunted House. As a result, everything said in this article isn’t a literal rule, just my feelings as a person.

Here are three things not to do in a Haunted House.

1. Don’t flirt with the actors.
   Is it the fake bloody makeup smeared and dripping all over an actor’s face? Maybe the torn clothes, the prop weapons, the chaotic-looking hair? Whatever itis that attracts a guest to a particular actor, I’ll never understand—nor do I want to. Whatever your reasoning is, please don’t flirt with the actors or make weird suggestive comments.
   Behind the scenes, my co-workers and I often share their stories about how one person asked for their DMs or even someone who made ‘kissy faces’ at them. If you’re reading this and thinking that this sounds absurd, you’re absolutely right.
   It may seem like a funny joke to some guests (why that is, I can’t begin to comprehend), but it’s not as fun when you’re on the receiving end. At the end of the day, this is a job for us. So, if you wouldn’t say it to the cashier at your local supermarket or the random waitress serving your food, don’t say it to the actors in the house trying to do their job.
   
2. Don’t touch them.
   Unfortunately, this often goes hand-in-hand with flirting. One time, a guest entered the room I was in, walked straight up to me, and grabbed my face like they were about to kiss me. Do I even have to explain how goddamn disturbing that is? It’s hard to prevent the occasional brush, especially because the hallways aren’t exactly the largest in spaces such as these, however, I’m referring to the purposeful touching. Don’t do this for multiple reasons.
   One being COVID. In case it somehow slipped one’s mind that we’re almost two years into a pandemic, here’s your reminder.
   Another reason is it’s just plain weird. Unless the actor is straight-up attacking and you need to physically defend yourself—which won’t ever happen—there’s no need to touch them.
   
3. Stop trying to act tough.
   Look, I get it. You can’t help it if you don’t get scared; but if you’re having a terrible time, walking around trying to pick a fight or ‘one-up’ the actor, is not exactly anyone’s definition of making it better.
   Chances are, you paid a decent amount of money for the Haunted House. You don’t have to be scared by everything and everyone, but the LEAST you can do with the money that you spent is try to have fun.

With all that being said, it’s simple to follow the rules as long you’re not trying to cause trouble. If you do choose to go to a Haunted House, I wish you the best of luck and hope you have a lot of fun!