How to get a Tinder date
Tinder can be both confusing and terrifying, but follow these tips and you will be earning yourself a one-way ticket to Pound Town in no time, my friend.
Tag: HUMOUR
Vancouver pub offers crazy Caesar garnish: Hope, Love
“We just want to make it a fun experience for everyone.”
Retail worker asks how customer is doing, receives murder confession
“Honestly, I wish I could say that’s the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me at this job.”
First week of new Cold War ‘going fairly okay’
“It’s like they always say, you know: ‘Hope for the best, prepare for a nuclear holocaust.’”
Kids born in the 2000s now on roads, police warn
“We know that it’s a frightening time to be driving, especially for the seniors out there, but we can assure the public that we are doing everything in our power to keep traffic as safe as possible.”
Filmmakers continue to bravely insist on making the majority of their films male-centric
“Like, how many female characters and female-led storylines do you want? Half? In what world is that realistic?”
Student who finished first too nervous to hand in test, class stalls
“It’s now been 143 hours and 17 minutes. They could have written their midterms, finals, and 20-page research papers by now.”
You can now get official certification in mansplaining
Never use “in my opinion,” “I think,” or show any leniency or doubt, because you have to make her realize that she only thinks the way she does because she doesn’t know any better.
Women wearing short skirts in this weather are better, stronger than I am
They are not beholden to the whims of the weather. They are made of stronger stuff than most.
The great salt wars
We were our own worst enemies, at the beginning of it all, though the war that would befall us was one that no one could have possibly foretold.