Reports show that Orville Jones is that enthusiastic in real life
By Natalie Serafini, Assistant Editor
Sources say that Orville Jones, host of the popular Get Up and Get With It!, is as chipper as he appears. His enthusiasm, which most assumed was an act, is really what he’s like on a daily basis—some sources wished to emphasize that it’s on a “minute by minute basis.”
The crew of Get With It! seems to be frustrated by the incessant enthusiasm.
“Orville’s always like that. It’s just nonstop,” says production assistant, Josh Singh. “He won’t stop giving people high-fives. We thought it was nice at first, that he was encouraging the crew so much, but some of them have started to develop calluses.”
The issue of giving high-fives reached a peak when, in the middle of a show, Jones ran offstage to praise and high-five a lighting assistant who was doing “just wonderfully, just lighting the set to perfection! Apollo should bow down to you!” Sources say it took the crew more than 10 minutes to get the host back on track and on the stage, at which point he stood shouting, “Are you ready? Are you ready? I can’t hear you!” which further held up production.
Jones shouting enthusiastically at the crew is not a new problem, says Get With It!’s director, Sid Sack: “I was trying to hold a meeting, to discuss some problems with that day’s show, and Orville just wouldn’t let me talk. I mean, he kept introducing me, even though all the employees already know who I am. He’d say something like, ‘Here he is, the man, the legend, the director: Sid Sack! Sid Sack, everybody!’”
“He tones it down for the show, you know,” adds Sack.
His encouragement and generosity have started to seem insincere, as Debbie Clark, make-up artist, explains: “Last Christmas, he came in and got us all hyped up. He made everyone gather around in front of him and was building up how great these presents he was getting for everyone were. Finally, he tells us what he’s giving us and says ‘Everyone is going home with a car! You get a car, and you get a car, and you get a car!’ Well, most of us broke down crying, ‘cause some of us take the bus into work, and a car would help a lot with that. I mean, who doesn’t want a free car? So we’re all ecstatic, but the next day, we get a memo saying, ‘Unfortunately, due to lack of funds, you will not be getting a car, and you will not be getting a car, and you will not be getting a car…’”
Cameraman Biff Thompson agrees that the situation was not well-planned. “What an asshole, am I right? It would have been better if he just hadn’t told us we were getting cars at all. Along with the memo, everyone got a lottery ticket—one of those $1 ones that you get from the convenience store. He was the only one who won anything, and then he split his winnings with the crew, to be ‘generous.’ I got a cheque for 1/4 of a penny. Merry fucking Christmas, right?”
The crew speculate that Jones may suffer from ADHD. They’re petitioning for him to get help in the form of narcotics.
Clark feels the medication is necessary, expressing that, “He can take a Xanax or he can go fuck himself. Those are his options. He’s not forcing me to scream in excitement while I do his makeup anymore.”
“Really any medication will do,” says Sack. “Atomoxetine, Xanax, Diazepam, Codeine, anything. I’ve done my research.”