Diary of an accidental American
We are far from civilized America—instead, we pass old “Make America Great Again” signs that once stood on the lawns of rural Washington residents.
Category: HUMOUR
Woman arrested for texting partner too many times in a row
“Now I can freely walk the streets knowing that I won’t be confronted with the need to address any issues in a relationship I was part of.” -Mark Daven
Spence introduces new line of gluten-free diamonds
“Other diamond companies keep their diamonds locked in tiny cages around the clock—they never to see the light of day, or feel the grass under their incredibly sparkly feet. You won’t find any of that here.” – Spencer Spencington
A sexier Halloween: The Threequel
Don’t fret! We’re back with another list of sexy costumes that will blow the minds of your friends and lovers!
No need to sneak these from mom’s cookie jar: Make them yourself!
“If you long to finally bake the cookies my mother selfishly kept from me all these years, you’re in luck, because I was finally able to rip this recipe from her cold, dead hands.”
Local white person shocked that peace and love doesn’t solve racism
Why is it so hard to understand that peace and love is the way? After all, Kendall Jenner fixed racism with a can of Pepsi! Maybe if people just tried it, it could work.
Shoppers Drug Mart recalls new decoration line after complaints
My package it opened a door to hell,” stated Linda Willman, Richmond resident. “I didn’t know what to do; I don’t have a building permit for that.”
McDonald’s apologizes for trauma caused by 10-legged chickens
On September 30, our group of mature, GMO chickens ran up and over the thirty foot wall surrounding our lab. These chickens proceeded to reach speeds of up to 200 kilometers an hour as they ran towards the town of Taber in hopes of finding their desired food source: Corn.
MoA opens exhibit on the rise of the nerd
As total dorks and massive dweebs become increasingly mainstream, anthropologists at the university have made an effort to show how nerds have changed, grown, and become commonplace with a display that moves chronologically backwards.