Political scientists: We did not see that shit coming. Like, at all.
By Liam Britten, Chief Right-Wing Lunacy Editor
In a move that has sent shockwaves through provincial politics across the nation, the Alberta provincial election ended with the most right-wing option not winning, somehow.
The Wildrose Party, headed by Danielle Smith, dubbed “the Sarah Palin of Canada” was seeking to end over 40 years of Progressive Conservative (PC) rule in the province. Featuring a roster of candidates that counted anti-abortion activists, homophobic preachers, climate change-deniers, and outright racists within their ranks, the party seemed to be a shoo-in for Canada’s most reactionary province.
Yet, it wasn’t to be. And research and polling after the fact is revealing that many Albertans, shockingly, were actually put off by the over the top views held by the Wildrose Party.
“I consider myself a conservative, definitely,” said St. Albert resident Graham McGraw. “I believe taxes of any sort are basically slavery, life begins at conception, and I really don’t like the idea of foreigners living around here. But those Wildrose folks… they just seem kind of crazy, you know?”
Political scientists are flabbergasted that a political party like Wildrose couldn’t win in a province like Alberta. With veiled and explicit hints towards the practical elimination of the provincial government machinery and the return to a system of extreme laissez faire capitalism not seen since the 1920s, it would seem as though they had tapped into the very soul of the average Albertan. However, something simply didn’t click between the party and voters.
Professor Donald Barry of the University of Calgary has several theories as to why this was the case.
“First of all, the party was branded by the media as a bunch of raving, far-right lunatics who planned on basically crippling government’s ability to do anything. The party said that wasn’t the case—and ultimately, that was their mistake. They should have embraced that extremist cred and run with it. That would have been bold,” he said.
Barry also mentioned that the Wildrose Party may have also made a mistake by forgetting that Alberta also has non-white voters.
Some Candidates for the Wildrose Party
Who exactly were the candidates of the Wildrose Party, and what did they stand for? We examine a few here:
The son of a family oil drillers, Strankman not only opposes all environmental regulations on Alberta’s oil and gas sector, but also proposed a bill for the Legislature calling for oil to be renamed “Jesus Sweat.”
Rimbey-Rocky Mountain House-Sundre
Anglin is part of the so-called “left wing” of the Wildrose Party, as he only favours capital punishment for 38 crimes, seven of which are misdemeanours.
Barnes once called television “Satan’s Puppet Show” and called for everything beginning with the letter “Y” to be outlawed.